I have actually done it. I am the proud owner of a lap band. I stopped my metformin yesterday. I am not hungry. I have other things going on in there - one new feeling too. But no hunger.
Can't burp. Tried. Can't. Gets to sternum and stops - ah, but does a sneaky. It goes away quietly quietly. You forget, too late. It emerges triumphant as an enormous fart. Inoffensive really as farts go, but a fart none the less. I had my Lapband less than 24 hrs when I worked out this new mechanism.
The bruising is going to be a doozy, the poor theatre staff also had to use pink stuff instead of iodine( I am allergic) - and I looked impressive post-op. All strawberry pink & swollen bellied. Very attractive.
I am also allergic to latex.
How did I find that one out?
Which form of contraceptive is made of latex?
ah ha
Anyway, you go first or lastinto theatre, everything is covered up & gloves are vinyl etc. All dressings are checked for latex. The interesting thing I found out this time is that if you are allergic to latex you should avoid the following foods:
Oranges,pineapples, grapefruit, bananas, avocadoes, mangoes & most other citrus fruits.
So now,
No bread, no pastry, no rice, no pasta, no citrus, no dairy (except live yogurt)no pineapple, no grapefruit, no bananas, no mangoes, no avocadoes - and I already cannot eat egg yolk. Maybe I am just meant to have tha lapband after all!
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