Night in a Hotel. Slept like a log. The Nurse had given me a little book on Lap Banding (don't forget the copyright sign) I must have fallen asleep at 9.15pm.
Went to the local supermarket that evening and bought my last dinner:
French bread
Brie
olives
basil
chicken
cranberry & soda
chocolate
tomatoes
cucumber
pate - farmhouse & cracked pepper
Ate quarter loaf with brie & basil, another quarter with pate,olive,tomato &cucumber. Had two huge glasses of 1:3 cranberry &soda 4 bits of chocolate & a black tea. Last meal. Couldn"t face the chicken.
Ran a huge scented bubble bath and talked to my darlings for 45 mins, caught up on their days, fell into bed - woke up at usual 6.30am - smiled went back to sleep until 7.15. Got up showered did hair dressed & went down for Hotel Breakfast.
Hotel Breakfasts
I am in two minds about Hotel Breakfasts. You have the Langham at one end and at the other.... well lets not go there. This hotel was a 5 if the Langham is a 9. The Croissants ( my last bear in mind) were inedible as they were undercooked from frozen. The coffee was okay. The toast good as you toasted your own wholegrain. I also had muesli - but with crushed Weetbix in it?? - with plain yogurt. Ah well.
A couple of hot buttery croissants with apricot jam and fresh dark black coffee would have been nice. A Pain au Chocolat, Vogels toast, proper muesli with pears & yoghurt..........
Nutritionist
Another lovely woman. This team is great. You go in. You sit down - and bang on time you are called through. She's slender and darkhaired and in her late twenties - and UNDERSTANDING. None of this " it's all about willpower" bullshit. She explains the regime concisely and well - I understand first time. Answers my questions on Ketosis. Then she gets the meal replacements out.
Oh. My. God.
They are revolting.
I love good food. I love slow cooked casseroles of venison, Roast chicken with Lemon & Thyme, Mediterranean Roast Veggies, Fresh fish, Crispy veggies, salads full of crunch and flavour, lamb shanks in red wine, I make a mean lean meat loaf pie - these silver packets are... are.... NOT FOOD!
I am handed a list by this pretty, well educated young woman.
"Just tick the ones you think you would most like - or delete the ones that you would not like and I will make up your meals to take with you before you leave today."
"okay"
Beef Curry soup - delete
Strawberry shake - delete
Honeycomb shake - double delete
Lemon Mousse - (what?) delete
Mint Chocolate Bar - delete
and so it went on.
I'm left with, oddly enough, Veggie soup, Chicken Soup, Chocolate shakes, Chocolate bars & 3 Choc berry crunch bars for a change. Oh God what have I done?
The Psychologist
I am not mad.
Good to establish. I am not so sure. After 16 years of parenting - I would have thought I was veering towards eccentric at least.
Small digression: we call it " eccentric" in my family. This covers most things. From full blown madness - an Auntie of 13 in the 1920's running around the house at night with a breadknife ( it may have been a carver) and leaping out windows to go and "meet" strange men. She was placed in a home for the rest of her life - to dressing flamboyantly & inappropriately - another Aunt who had lots of multicoloured feathers through her hair (a fashion statement) at her daughters wedding. No Hat. Just feathers which molted during the day.
Anyway, we discussed personality change, relationship changes - all of which I have already discussed ad nauseam with my husband - so I was fairly clued up and sorted out.
I think others may change towards me - if I change alot physically, that may alter how some perceive me - their problem not mine - we will see! Especially the skinny friends who love to have a fat friend......
Relationships -I love my husband - he will just have to love the new me - skinsuit and all - he's more worried I will run off with my new body & a toyboy. I think I will need a great deal of Nancy Ganz Underwear before I can even think of running anywhere.
Besides, a new husband takes 6 months to train - and I just can't be bothered...
We talked of children - and having them later in life. Of fat and thin. Of society. Of options and peer pressure on teenagers and explaining the Op to my two. All good useful and practical stuff.
Now I know where all the intelligent women in NZ hang out.
Therapist
Again a really nice clever woman with a horrid cold. I think a neurolinguist as she took note of the words I used as part of the therapy. This was the gut wrenching bit as she really did get to the core of my fears horribly quickly. How on earth did she do that? With a head cold?
I really fear this op failing.
She knew this very quickly and honed in on it.
By the end of the session I was happier, a bit wrung out, but we understood each other. And she was right. Bugger it.
Went back to main Office. Now late afternoon. I feel a bit drained, but know for sure I am doing the right thing. Ladies in Office call the practice nurse. She appers with bag of Meal Replacements. Yum. I pay the bill. Feel so emotionally relieved and happy and have such a huge weight of my shoulders that I cry quietly much of the way home.
Stop half way for walk & visit to new patchwork shop. Book into dollmaking class in February 2011.
My darlings all home.
Exhausted. Went to bed early. Sleep soundly for second time in over a year.
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